Imagine a medieval battlefield (perhaps you've seen Braveheart) where two lone warriors are fighting, wounded and bloody. At some point, they realize the futility of their struggle and know if they don't stop, one -- or more likely, both of them are going to end up dead.Who puts down their weapon first?

And THEN what happens?

There's a certain kind of surrender, combined with both integrity and a certain kind of strength, that we all recognize from the movies.

You know what I mean, right?

If one side's got ulterior motives, the two men are apt to end up fighting again in an instant.

When you begin to work on forming a bridge to the stepmom or mom, you cannot have a knife hiding behind your back. Or a sword by your leg. You can't have a shield covering your chest either.

This isn't the same thing as giving up the will to live and letting the other side do what it wants!

When you "try" with the mom and stepmom and it doesn't work, because "it never works," to what extent are you truly laying down your weapons?

When you argue with your partner or a family member, do broken-record arguments ever get resolved by defending your same old position... or through the awesome power of a genuinely "soft" heart?

We can all tell the difference when someone is "trying" because they're trying to show us up...

and when they're really trying.

© 2009 Jennifer Newcomb Marine    All Rights Reserved